I always had this huge interest in the Qabalah mostly from getting to “know” the person called David Wells though the very old TV series called “Most Haunted”  but also my growing interest in the mindfulness as a personal way to gain my balance after the divorce, and the disappointment there followed with all the betrayal and dark feelings.

I try to meditate and challenges my understanding of my self as a  spiritual person, mostly to find my extreme senses, there always have been a frighting experiences all the way back to my childhood. The ability to hear sounds at a very low frequency and my visual gift of seeing the world in colors even on a visual level. Some may call it high sensitivity, but in dark times where everything seems so hard, and feeling raging against my better judgment, they become a force I’m proud of. Beginning to live with it instead of running from it and hiding in broken relationships. The idea of being alone just 3 months ago was scary and almost forced me in to a new broken relationship, but though the help of my psychologist there also have a huge insight to the the world of mindfulness, I’m learning to live on my own, and starting to do the things I have been suppressing the last 13 years.

So why is it that I find the Tarot so interesting…? Well it’s the ability that mediums have, the way to interpreted visual inputs in pictures, symbols sounds and short words, that the Tarot trains you in. I know that we all have the ability to use our 3rd eye and our minds to see existence in a non physical way, but being able to catch and tune in to the none physical level, is a hard thing to learn , not hard as in physical hard, but in finding the peace and relaxation to make you self relax and not turn your head in to the light is the challenge of the job. All which I hope the Tarot can teach me over time.